Funny craigslist car ad ...

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jason
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Posts: 4968
Joined: 13 Sep 2004 18:00
Location: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada

Funny craigslist car ad ...

Post by jason »

Thanks Richard :lol: !

Link to original ad:

Text from ad:

This isn't your normal skyline. This motherfcker is the skyline God would drive if he wasn't busy doing God sh*t like making tsunamis and crap. Its set up to go fast, and go fast sideways. Who doesn't like to get sideway?! Terrorists, thats who. Are you a terrorist? No? Then you need this car.

Handling? This car handles like a junior executive CEO. Go around corners like the devil himself is chasing you, and not give a fck.

Whats that? You like drifting? Well I've got some great god d@mn news for you. This car was a drift project of mine, and the last owner was planning on making it a drift machine too. Interior is for pussies so we got rid of it. Manly as fck. It literally oozes testosterone. So much so that its puddling up in the back.

Seats? this cocks*cker has got two. One for you, and one for the hot @ss broad thats gunna be all upons your dick after you buy this car. You're a girl? Sh*t works both ways. One seat for you, and one seat for that hot @ss dude you've been trying to hook up with for weeks. Deal with it,sh*ts getting serious.

Stereos and AC are for hippies. Fortunately this car has neither. Oh look at me, I like listen to Simon and Garfunkel and think about puppies. F*ck that. The only noises you're gunna be hearing is the ultra manly engine noises coming from this sweet turbocharged, intercooled, 24 valve inline 6. Sh*ts getting real, real f*cking fast.

This car has got a bright orange ebrake handle (b*tches love orange) with a drift button for those super ultra megahellatastic bar room brawler ebrake lockers. F*ck. Yes.

Now, I'll be honest. The wheels are a little lackluster, although everyones gunna be so focused on your super gangster drifting that nobody is going to give a f*ck about your sh*tty stock 16s. Don't worry, I've got you fcking covered. Its like we're in Vietnam and you just got ambushed by Charlie. Don't worry, friend, I've got your fcking back and I blow charlie to kingdom fcking come. For an extra $450 I can throw in some added p*ssy magnets for wheels, just don't come crawling back to me complaining that you're getting TOO much vajayjay. Bright fcking green 18s. Greens not your thing? Super legit silver 18s. Done like dinner.

This car has got 1.5 metric f*ck tons of awesome parts. Bride, Greddy, Brembo, the list doesn't f*cking END. It just keeps going and going, like the energizer bunny on speed.

You like going fast? Ever tried to outrun 24 police cars and 3 helicopters? You need this car. It will go so fcking fast that you may very well go back in time. It happened to me once. Just once, but it was fcking rad. Its like someone took a rocket and opened its mouth and poured steroids down its throat and and threatened to kill its family if it wasn't the fastest motherfcker you've ever driven.

I get it. You're busy, I'm busy, lets not waste time. If you're interested send me a message and I'll get back to you ASAP. You send me a message, I send you one right back. Thats how this works.


Location: Maple Ridge
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Jason
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McShagger510
Posts: 1821
Joined: 26 Mar 2004 20:55
Location: East Van, Canada

Re: Funny craigslist car ad ...

Post by McShagger510 »

Ha Ha super funny ad!! Here is the same guy, same car but a WAAAAAAY different ad:

*In response to all the emails and texts I've been getting, price is firm. US citizens: I will not drive the car down to the states for you. I have no issues with selling a car to someone from the states, but I will only sell the car in Canada. If you want to come up here and drive the car down yourself thats fine.

**In response to all the people that seem to think "$5000 firm" means "$4000", I will not respond to your texts/ emails. The only way I will let it go for $4000 is if I keep the wheels, tires, seats, and front brakes. I'm sick of people that have never seen or driven the car offering me 4 grand. Show some class. Just because you can get a skyline with a blown headgasket and lots of rust for $4000 doesn't mean every other skyline is now worth $4000. I can do $4800 if you bring your own seat.

E:ngine:
255 lph fuel pump
Nismo adjustable FPR
Greddy FMIC
Turbosmart Megasonic BOV
RSR Individia exhaust
Turbo Timer
AC Deleted
Intake
Rebuilt alternator
Rebuilt starter
New battery (Aug 19)

Interior:
Bride zeta
Boost gauge
Water temp gauge
Drift button
Everything else is gutted
The previous owner still has the interior and is willing to sell the carpet, headliner, rear seats, and centre console for $50 dollars


Handling:
Tein lowering springs
JIC fixed FUCAs
1.5 way LSD (according to the last owner, I havent actually checked)
HICAS lock out bar/ removed HICAS
Strut bar
Brembo front rotors, stock size. Less than 1500 km
Pretty much new brake pads, done with rotors
Beefy single plate clutch

Exterior:
Rolled fenders (all 4 corners)
Hood spacers
Rear wiper deleted

The Bad:
Short in the headlight relay
Aftermarket water temp gauge not hooked up
Speedo stopped working (tach, boost, etc all work)

I have extra parts (wheels, tires, brakes, etc) that I can include for a bit extra as well. If you have any questions, feel free to call or text me at 778 229 5820, my name is Matt. Interested in trading for an R6, ZX6R, CBR600, or GSXR600 of equal value. Not interested in trading for anything else.

Thanks for looking!


Location: Maple Ridge
The person with the sun in their eyes has the right of way. - my brother

'72 2dr. 510 Turbo
'73 240Z all stock
'71 2dr. 510 stock......for now
'91 Nissan truck *SOLD*
'02 TOYOTA Tacoma
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'84 Kawasaki GPZ750 Turbo
'99 Kawasaki ZRX1100
datzenmike
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Joined: 24 May 2006 12:40
Location: Van. Isle.

Re: Funny craigslist car ad ...

Post by datzenmike »

They talk like that in Maple Ridge??? lolz. The ad's funny but with all the things wrong with it and it being just another owner stripped wannabe drifter Skyline..... meh.
"Nissan 'shit the bed' when they made these, plain and simple." McShagger510 on flattop SUs
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